Birthdays

As I complete one more year of my existence, I wish I was a little more remarkable than what I am now. I wish I didn't sound so spoilt, lazy, cynical and predictable. I am a bundle of contradictions with no direction.

I wish I had some of the wonder my daughter has in her eyes. To her, life is still about waiting for her birthday parties and wishing for a birthday every day.

When does that change? When does achievement and success take the place of joy and wonder? I guess when ego makes itself felt. When ego is dominant in me, I feel more about my own individual desires and achievements than when I am without ego. During our childhood, ego is still hidden in all the fluff and magic. As adults and parents we do the disservice of bringing our children out of the cloud and call it growing up.

I know that life indeed is beautiful and is a gift in itself. Everyday is a birthday and I have been given the opportunity of knowing and loving myself better. But its unfortunately not so simple or it is so unbearably simple that its difficult to practise.